I want to be a movie critic

I want to be a movie critic because I really love the movies (I see at least one each week - most recent 'The Forgotten'), but I don’t want to write my critiques down. I want to create a job, something with hours, like, 10am – 12pm, then 2pm – 4pm, 6pm – 7:30pm where people would call me on the phone and I would give them my movie review.

I think this is a great idea because everyone would get that personal touch and have a quick but extremely expensive conversation with me.

Now, I can already foresee the problems with this new job, I’ve just created for myself.

• I would have to buy another phone line
• I would have to advertise
• There is only one of me, so there will be a long wait period on the phone

I guess the most important obstacle to my plan, is who in the hell wants to spend money hearing a live movie review?

It sounded good in my head; I guess that’s why people write business plans to see if their plans will really work.

What do you think?

God, what am I going to do with my life. I always have these crazy ideas.

not the cigarettes

I can’t get rid of this cough. I’ve had it for 3 weeks now, no other symptoms, just a cough. It’s a mean loud barking cough that scares little children.

I suspect it’s either the cigarettes or I have TB.

I hope it’s not the cigarettes.

a monkey can do my job and the dead bird

I went into my part-time job today. I honestly believe a monkey can do my job. Seriously, a monkey! Well, maybe not a "straight-from-the-jungle" monkey, but at least one of those helper monkeys for the blind and disabled.

When I went down to take a smoke break, a small green and blue colored bird was flying around, of course I was afriad but tried to keep my cool because other smokers were hanging around. Suddenly, the bird flew into the glass ceiling. It dropped to the ground and died. It was quite shocking to me. It just had mistaken the glass as the sky and bumped it's head and DIED. Now, I have to admit, I have absolutely no feelings towards animals, actually i have much resentment for all animals, but I felt sad.


All I kept thinking was "stupid little bird."

are we honest people?

A friend told me I'm not an honest person and that kind of upset me. For I do believe I am an honest person, but they explained their definition of honesty was more inclusive than mine.

Interesting.

Well, my definition of honesty does not include information of omission. I mean, what things are we suppose to divulge to everyone, in order to be honest. Do I have to say "oh yeah at 10am I took a shit"? I mean, where is the line drawn.

What makes someone an honest person?

Perhaps I feel that I am honest because I do not purposely (and sub-consciously) try to hurt anyone (physically and mentally). If you ask me a question I will tell the truth, the best of my knowledge. Now that is not to say my actions never hurt people, for they sometimes may and do; but it was not my intention.

I remember a quote, “No one can make you feel inferior, with out your permission”. I believe this is very true. We give certain people in our lives power/control over ourselves, which cause us to be easily hurt or angered by their actions and words.

For instance, my mother can say something like “are you wearing that tonight”. That’s a simply question, right? If anyone else says that to me, which I can easily infer they don’t like my outfit, I would usually say “bugger off, yeah I’m wearing it”. But if my mom says it I’ll get really upset and re-think my outfit. I believe it’s because she has a power over me that I gave her, which can easily crush my ego. We often give our boy/girlfriends, friends, relatives, etc. this same power, where something little and can hurt us forever.

Do I make any sense? Could it be, no one is honest? Are all just going through life, just saying what everyone wants to hear. I'm not sure, but now I'm not sure if I'm an honest person or not. Damn it, I hate when I have to second guess myself. It's like every time I feel I'm confident in something, someone says something or tells me something that totally changes my mind. Wait, is that just life? Isn't that a good thing? Either way, I feel silly. I will never make any proclamations about myself ever again, for I have no idea how I really feel. I change my mind so often, it's pathetic.

I remember those good old times in high school/teenage years, where I knew everything. I had clear cut opinions on all life's issues. I knew I was smarter than my parents and the world was mad. I use to say just give me one week, I'll have Palestinians and Israelis doing the macaraina in no time. Of course, now a mere 25, I have no idea how I feel about anything. I remember a time when I thought smoking and drinking was the worst thing someone could do to their body, I must say I feel completely different now as I sip my wine from a box and take a long drag from my Marlboro Menthol Light. My opinions change and I feel so unsure most of the time. I guess it's all about living and growing, as you live and grow, your opinions HAVE to change, otherwise, are we making any progress?

Sigh...

Okay, I have no idea what I'm talking about now, I'm going to sleep.

working for da man

I do not like this part time job.

It disturbs me.

Geez, every time I walk in, I feel like a little piece of my soul is dying.

After this, no more "office" jobs for me, I'd rather do the lab tests down at the university for money than go to this place.

Stangers With Candy

Strangers With Candy is one of the funniest, underground shows EVER! Too bad it's off the air now, but it use to come on Comedy Central.

I just brought Season 1 off amazon.com and just came in the mail today!! Here are a couple quotes to keep you company as I watch all the episodes:

"I cried when I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. Then I laughed...really hard."

"Orlando, you can't be a pilgrim. The pilgrims had snowy white skin to match their pure Christian souls. They didn't sacrifice coconuts to their monkey gods."

"Befriending new people can lead to having sex with your children, accidentally."

"Don't worry, I can't get pregnant. My ovaries are diseased."

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As with most obsessions I have to do my research and I'm happy I found out they are making a movie out of Stangers With Candy!!! Can you believe it!! If you are reading this, when it comes out in theatres (currently in post production) you have to RUN and see it. If you have comcast cable, you can watch some of the old shows via. OnDemand under Comedy Central.

George Michael

I will admit, because that's the first step, right? I REALLY like George Michael. It hurts me to say, but I believe it's on the verge of obsession. I don't even know why. It's not like I want him to be mine or "be with me", I just think he's very talented, and that voice, OH! that voice.


This is George Michael and his boyfriend Kenny. And on top of that George smokes Marlboro, just like me!! Just kiddin', I mean, yeah he does smoke but I was joking, trying to look for little connections between the two of us. I'm not that crazy of a fan. Notice the rings, on their hands... interesting. He's so cute, even though I've read interviews where he says he's self-conscience about his looks, but he's a cutie and his boyfriend (who's American, yah! USA).

Anyway, if you haven't heard his new album Patience, buy it today. It's very good. A couple of my personal favorites:

Flawless (Go To the City) - this is a dance song, great beat and the words will inspire any kid stuck in a little town to leave! "I think you know that you are more than just/Some fucked up piece of ass" --> when he sings this, i get goose bumps.

John & Elvis Are Dead - wow! great singing, but on top of that you can listen to the words and get many different meanings. personally, i just figure he's talking about how can God let bad things happen. How can He let greatness die. Of course, my interpretation can be wrong. "If Jesus Christ is alive and well/How come John and Elvis are dead/"

My Mother Had a Brother - wow! I can just imagine how it feels to find out "family secrets" years later. It's nicely written and a sad song. "My Mother had a brother/Over-sensitive and kind"