I saw David Sedaris tonight

I saw David Sedaris tonight. He’s a humor writer who started out on NPR.

First let me say, I’ve never heard NPR, I’ve heard OF it, but never listened, it’s a radio station, right? Perhaps I’m the only person in the US who have never listened, and therefore always behind in social circles.

I’ve only read Me Talk Pretty One Day, which was hilarious! Especially the essay ‘You can’t kill the rooster’. So when I heard he’s coming to Philly I brought a ticket. Well “brought” might be too strong of a word, but that’s another story upon itself.

While standing in line to “buy” tickets I bumped into Amy Sedaris, his sister (played Jerry Blank in Strangers with Candy), and by “bump” I mean saw. I wanted to run over to her and yell “I’ve got something to say!” (Reference from Strangers with Candy), but decided to play it cool by totally ignoring her. I’m sure that’s what she would prefer.

Anyway…

In my mind, David Sedaris is this cool metropolitan guy. He lives in France, travels the world and is a wonderful writer. A person with this description, in my mind, has this deep ultra cool voice.

Fast forward.

Mr. Sedaris walks on stage at the Kimmel Center wearing a button up shirt and slacks. I could not give you more detail than that, because I was at least 10,000 feet away from the stage.

He first said “hello”.

My heart stank.

His voice was the opposite of what I envisioned. Now I’m not saying it was high pitched and girl-like, however it was just the opposite of what I wanted him to sound like. It took me 15 minutes to get over his real voice. I just sat there thinking, “is that your real voice?” I knew in any minute he would clear his throat and begin talking three octaves lower.

That never happened.

He spent the night reading different essays from his books and a couple diary/journal entries he’s made in the last 3 years. They were all funny! Luckily for me, I haven’t read the other books so everything was new and exciting.

The night went well, except I left his book in the car and wasn’t able to get it signed.